Booking Out

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12.6.13

HappySappy Printer's Row Lit Fest BooksLast weekend I found myself in the trifecta of happy planning: (1) there was an event I wanted to go to, (2) I KNEW about said event PRIOR to its occurrence, and (3) I was free for the event.

The Printer’s Row Lit Fest had previously escaped me since the happy day I found out that there was a Chicago fest entirely devoted to books. But last weekend I caught it. And I caught it good.

Printer’s Row is like the epicenter in this city for everything I’m a sucker for. Prettiness. Old buildings. Brick. Books. A clock tower. And then the frosting on the cake (and we all know the frosting is ALWAYS the best part), I met O on Printer’s Row. It’s almost like this area of the city is overreaching in its effort to get me to fall in love with it.

And I’m smitten.

Add a bunch of book nerds, PANELS with BLOGGERS, and an extra helping of books, and I’m a happy lady.

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^^^ That’d be the Tavi Gevinson in the flesh. I girl-crushed my heart out.

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What is it about books that can make you so gaga? I love chocolate but I would never get the thrill from a room full of chocolate barss that a room full of books gives me. It has to be a mix of the adventure and the benefit: each book contains ideas and imaginings that you hadn’t previously conceived of (NEARLY guaranteed) and those ideas and imaginings then become a part of you. Unlike the long gone chocolate bar (which you now maybe carry with you in a potentially undesirable way), the book and its content stays with you and shapes your understanding of life and all, and even better, SHAPES YOU. A fest full of books is like a fest full of undiscovered adventures and growings that you hadn’t even known existed. A reminder that the world is bigger than we can imagine, and that we still have the opportunity to conquer so much more of it.

Thoughts from a week-ish off

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10.6.13

HappySappy Chicago

  • After falling just short of finishing Blog Every Day in May, I needed an almost-well-earned break.
  • During Blog Every Day in May I discovered that good things can come, even from a writing prompt I despise. And that nothing good will come when I’m truly feeling uninspired.
  • Photos were taken from my run the other day. I think a lot of Chicagoans have a nasty habit of forgetting that Chicago is a city on a body of water. Every time I run by the lake I’m rather surprised to find it there. Helloooo beautiful!
  • The guy with the bike in the photo above spent a bunch of time taking pictures of his bike with the Chicago skyline in the background. At first I thought he was going for a good shot to post with a Craigslist ad or something for his bike. But he just. kept. going. So now I’m thinking he’s in some sort of brotherhood of a traveling bike and he needed to take photos to show the other members where the bike had traveled. I wonder where it’s headed next…
  • In the slow process that is O moving in, I discovered a bag chalk full of back up loofahs stuffed under the sink. The man is nothing if not prepared.
  • In a burst of inspiration for Project: Make My Office a Happy Place, I spent a small fortune on office supplies on Etsy last week. Now I get the joy of waiting for all of my goodies to arrive…
  • If you also need to cheer up your office, may I recommend this, this, and of course ALL OF these.
  • Last week my adult dance company performed at (1) a children’s dance recital, (2) a high school talent contest, and (3) a year end orchesis showcase. We’re too cool for school guys.

HappySappy Chicago

HappySappy Chicago

HappySappy Chicago^^I hope with everything I have that Jack & Pam are still happy, together, and that they have enough loofahs.

Agreeable Extreme

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30.5.13

To Dance

In the sticky (rather privileged) land of the quarter-life-crisis there’s almost too much “letting go” happening. It’s like childhood is being torn from your eyes and heart completely against your will. Looming adulthood and decisionhood and responsibilitihood are standing right in front of you, and you no longer have naps or summers spent at the water park to hide behind.

Even while stumbling through all of this “letting go” I am still actively trying to let go of a childhood trait that continues to haunt me. Because I know IF I can do it, I’m more likely to get what I want out of life. And I think that’s the point of the quarter-life crisis. Letting go of childhood safeties and for once thinking on your own and deciding what you want.

I’m trying to let go of being agreeable.

I grew up in a household of big personalities. And I love ‘em. (To this day I have a special admiration for anyone with a big personality. Being all you and pushing the limits? THAT is living!)

But as such I developed a bad habit early on of being as agreeable as possible. I thought that if I could shrink down my own personality as much as possible then we’d have some extra room in the car for the big ones. Opinion on where to go to dinner? Oh no, whatever is fine with me! What movie do you want to watch? All of them sound great! What is your favorite color? Whatever color anyone else hasn’t taken!

I do think being agreeable is a good thing. Agreeable light can mean that you are nice and accommodating and even just friendly. But agreeable extreme can mean sacrificing your own preferences, opinions, and even what you believe is just and fair to the will of the crowd.

There have been quite a few instances in which agreeable extreme has not served me well. Past relationships in which I had virtually no power and never dared to express an opinion. Times when I’ve been paying for a product or service and not dared to point out that something was wrong. Accepting jobs or projects that I don’t care to do or in which I was greatly underpaid.

It’s so innate in my system that if you ask where I want to go to dinner tonight it’s likely that I have virtually no idea. My opinion-forming muscle is just that withered and neglected.

Rather than being a tool to make life smoother, agreeable extreme has served as a parasitic conflict avoidance tactic that just makes me end up being subject to the wills of others. Nasty bugger.

So I’m trying. Whether it be contributing to the discussion on dinner, going through pains to actually express how I feel even if it results in a fight, or contemplating adjusting a career path which brings my friends and family so much joy but leaves me wanting.

It may be pretty far in the future, but I am really looking forward to the day when agreeable extreme is no longer hanging out above my head. When it is let go. And I am just me. Conflicts and all.

Image ’Nigerian Children Dance’ by Jacob Holdt

Day 30, Thursday: Letting go.

Be My Thrill

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29.5.13

Once while on a date I was asked  if I was in to music. I wanted SO badly to say yes. In fact, if he had asked instead what kind of music was I in to, I would have rattled off some answer I hoped to be interesting.

But as much as I can acknowledge the importance of music, and as much as I love it as a dancer, for some reason I just never developed into a taste for this or that type of music. I definitely appreciate that the latest pop hit in which the lyrics are largely “na na na” took a shamefully low amount of effort compared to the latest, thoughtful, highbrow Indie hit. But in the end I’m just going to go for whatever I can belt out best in the shower.

I fully appreciate music appreciators. But my own appreciation for music is rather low

So as much as I would like to post five thoughtful, quality, meaningful songs to make myself seem the hipsterest of hipsters (oh… to dream), I’m going to have to go with one. But it’s not too low brow. It’s also not too high brow. It’s happy. It’s by an adorable group. That I’ve actually seen in person. And I love them. And the video is cute to boot.

Happy Wednesday!

 

Day 29, Wednesday: Five songs that speak to you.

Chicago Living

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29.5.13

Chicago Living

Chicago Living

Chicago Living

Chicago Living

Chicago Living

Chicago Living

Day 28, Tuesday: Only pictures.

Dear Reader

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28.5.13

Kisses

Kisses.

Day 26, Monday: A letter to your readers.

Oh the places

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26.5.13

Seuss

Graduation season! I have almost no connection to it this year, but it’s still exciting. The possibilities. Recognizing you’ve grown. Deciding what to do with the rest of your life. Fun, light stuff.

And as overrated as graduation speeches are, oh my gosh I love them. There aren’t that many times in life where we stop to audibly recognize when a life changing event is occurring, and then give people tips on how to proceed. Once I am queen of the world, such speeches will occur at every life moment. Start a new job? Inspiring speech! Preggers? Inspiring speech! Use the big girl potty for the first time? Inspiring speech!

When I graduated from my über-liberal college they got us a very big-deal political speaker, who spent the whole speech talking about war. I mean, war is very important issue in the U.S., and something we need to be aware of, but come ooooon. Where were my big sweeping, inspiring generalizations on how to live a successful and happy life?

Sort of second best, the Harvard Business Review put together a list of advice some successful people had wish they heard at graduation. Here are some of my favorites:

The key to success (scientifically speaking) is perseverance. You’ve just got to hang in there — there’s no other way to win. But how do you do it? A great way to be more resilient is to stop comparing yourself to other people, and compare yourself to your own past performance — last week, last month, last year. Are you improving? That’s the only question that matters.

The tough, thorny problems are the most valuable ones, but most people will shy away from the challenge. Solve these problems.

Understand the way your mind works in relation to motivation. Money, a fancy title, a prestigious firm — these are what are known as extrinsic factors. Your friends and family can see them, you can put them on a resume, or discuss them in a job interview. But these visible, extrinsic factors are not a source of contentment. Rather, the research suggests they’re actually a source of discontentment — when they’re absent…

True motivation relies on a very different set of factors: they’re intrinsic in nature, much harder to measure, and may even be unique to you. Being given the opportunity to shoulder responsibility and work independently. The ability to learn and grow. And, perhaps most important of all, doing something you think is meaningful.

Begin with the end in mind: Who do you want to be? What legacy do you want to leave to our world, you partner, your children? Second, always do what you enjoy. Many times “success” will lead you to promotions which will become the envy of your friends, while leaving you empty and pulling you away from what you really love to do. Periodically assess what you are doing, find out what you don’t like to do, and just stop doing it. Finally, surround yourself with the best by proactively and carefully choosing your partner, your friends, your boss, your colleagues. You can’t do it alone, and in great company even the toughest times magically become glorious journeys.

Read the full article here.

Day 25, Sunday: Something you read online.

Image from the one and only: Seuss

Stuck UP

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25.5.13

Historically Accurate Disney Princess

I thought that you were the most stuck up person I had ever met!

- Said my good friend, years after having made said judgment

Continues to this day to be the thing that pushes me to be friendlier with new people. With mixed results of success.

Day 25, Saturday: Something someone told you about yourself that you’ll never forget.

Historically Accurate Belle by Claire Hummel

The worstest

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24.5.13

Ok! Back on track after a three day vacay. Sometimes life just… (as everyone has one of these lives, I’m assuming that sentence doesn’t need a finish…)

Gluttony

Ironic coming back today, because I’ve been stressing about this prompt since the start of Blog Every Day In May.

Expose my worst bits on the internet? Yeah sure ok.

It’s very tempting to just go interview-style on this question: I pay too much attention to detail! I’m too dedicated to my work! I just can’t stop organizing!

But in the interest of sincerity, I’ve decided to be brave and go with the truth. But to save some face I’ve added how I’m working on each at well. And golly, I’d love pointers if you have any.

Despite the picture above, gluttony does not make the top three.

Passive Aggressive

I only recently renewed my drive to work on this. The day after a heated conversation with O, I realized I’d been passive aggressive like whoa (something I thought I had worked on in the past), so I asked O: Am I passive aggressive?

Obviously I expected him to hem and haw over the answer, but no, he stated very matter-of-factly: Yup.

Oy.

So, back in to working on it. Learning to express everything I’m feeling rather than crunching down those feelings I deem “unreasonable.” Because feelings are stubborn buggers. They will find a way to escape no matter what I do.

Insensitive

Have you ever taken the Myers Briggs test? I’m mildly obsessed. It was a real eyeopener when I learned my personality type (INTJ) back at the beginning of college, and I think it’s continued to further my understanding of myself.

Awkwardly, people with my personality type are frequently labeled as arrogant, insensitive jerks. (My favorite/the most heartbreaking link I found may have to be the one in which a woman bravely asks the internet whether her boyfriend is acting in normal-INTJ fashion or whether he is simply a jerk. Maybe not mutually exclusive girlfriend…)

I’m completely guilty of this. The feelings of others can frequently be an afterthought for me, and I’m far more quick to give critiques than praise.

As much as I would love to just tell people “It’s not my fault! I’m an INTJ! You know how adorably jerk-y we are!”…it is completely my fault.

I try now to actively think about the feelings of others before I speak (especially when talking to those I know I frequently burn). O has actually come in as a phenomenal jerk-meter measuring my interactions with others (“Yeah Sarah… that was just…not ok.”), but the poor guy could probably use someone stepping in and measuring the jerk-y-ness of my interactions with him as well. Just keep swimming, just keep swimming, swimming, swimming…

Self-Centered

Oddly, this is the most painful one of me to admit but maybe the most obvious one. Shocker, the girl that writes a blog about herself is a bit self centered, right? (I know, I know, I snuck “a bit” in there…)

But I do think it’s one of the worst traits a person can have. There’s so much going on in the world, how much are you missing and who are you harming when your default is to focus on yourself as the center of the universe? Bluck.

Much like insensitiveness, I feel like the only way to work on this is to actively think about it. When talking to people I try to pause and do a mental tally of who we’ve been talking about more. Interrogation is an important part of my career, so I can always turn to that skill if we need to talk about them more. Once in awhile this results in a normal, healthy conversation.

Day 24, Friday: Your top three worst traits.

 

Fave Five

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20.5.13

I absolutely freaking love reading blogs.

Completely obsessed.

Fashion blogs were my gateway drug. Forever ago I saw a link to What Would A Nerd Wear on Glamour.com and just fell in love.

Soon I was taking a break from writing notes in class for grad school to see what Anh or Krystal or Christine were wearing on this day or that. It didn’t take long for me to go from fashion blogs, to well…everything blogs.

I’m not quite sure what it is. The chance to peek into someone else’s life. Learning about their experiences. As a result, learning more about yourself. And the pretty things. SO many pretty things.

My favorite blogs are a constantly rotating list. I always know which are my favs at any given moment, because they’re the blogs that I don’t bother going to my reader to read. I just straight up type in their address old school style and go.

There’s nothing that can make me fall in love faster than good writing. I’m a huge sucker for the whitty and the clever. If clever took me out to a nice dinner, I might sleep with him on the first date…except I’d feel like I was cheating on whit.

So in no particular order of preference (and in alphabetical order to prove it!) here are five of my favorites:

A Safe Mooring

Kirsty A Safe Mooring

As soon as you start reading Kirsty’s blog, you realize that you’ve found your new best friend. Her posts are an absolute delight. She uses her blog as a creative outlet from her corporate day job (I was obviously a goner once I learned that). And you can tell that her creativity must have been busting for an outlet, because it’s obvious from her blog that she has so much to give. Everything’s gorgeous, from the writing, to the images, to her DIY design.

Jaclyn Day

Jaclyn Day

Ok, as a largely fashion/shopping blog, this one varies a bit from my “love of writing.” But to be fair, when Jaclyn does write, it’s always a joy. The rest of the time she is regularly updating with adorable steals and deals. If you are even slightly interested in shopping, this blog becomes your crack addiction in no time flat.

Nat the Fat Rat

Nat the Fat Rat

Natalie’s popularity could not be more deserved. I love a girl who is hilarious, honest, loving, observant, insightful, fashionable, and with gorgeous photos to boot. No blog has ever made me literally lol as much as this one. The whisperings on her blog of a book deal have me absolutely giddy. Giddy is not an exaggeration. It completely illustrates my feelings on this. Giiiiiiiiiiddy.

Ordinary Tales By C

Ordinary Tales by C

Finding Colleen’s blog was one of those fun happenings of the internet. We follow enough of the same people on Instagram that I got to wondering who this “otbc” was who constantly left comments that left me laughing. Imagine my excitement when I found out she writes a blog. It’s been too much fun reading up on her life and adventures. (Her recent observation that saying you’re “trying” to get pregnant is just a socially acceptable way to say you’re going at it like bunnies only made me all the more delighted to have found her.)

The Daybook

The Daybook

I’ve been reading Sydney’s doll of a blog the longest. It’s probably because as I made my transition from fashion blogs to life/lifestyle/etc blogs, Sydney made a transition of her own. She graduated school and had a (cuuuuuute!) child, and has phased away from a lot of the fashion bit. It’s still there and it’s still fabulous, but mostly she showers her readers with the sweetest and cleverest observations on life and love. It’s kind of weird to me to know so much about a stranger, but I’ve probably been reading her blog for three years now… and I completely expect to continue long into the future.  I guess that’s the fun/odd/weirdest bit of blogging, eh?

Day 19, Sunday: Five of your favorite blogs and what you love about them.

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